Joan Brooks Baker’s memoir, The Magnolia Code (University of New Mexico Press, June 2020), a name she and her sister gave to the unwritten rules they were expected to live by as dyed-in-the-wool Southerners, explores the question how we should live our lives. Can we break away from the “The Code” and free ourselves of the constraints of society, class, and a culture that holds us back as women? Baker’s tale, both humorous and poignant, shares how she persevered in her desire to find her own way, navigating the paradox of the diverging paths of security with her own sense of who she wanted to be in the world.